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UNIVERSAL SOLDIERS

21/8/2014

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Picture
2007 / Director. Griff Furst.
Review by Glenn Cochrane.

Sometimes I need a good dose of Asylum movies. I'm sure you all know The Asylum... that low budget movie-house that pumps out gratuitous mockbusters and creature features. Movies like TRANSMORPHERS, THE DAY THE EARTH STOPPED, SHARKNADO and MEGA SHARK VS GIANT OCTOPUS. Most people ridicule them but then there's those few of us who LOVE what they do. We "get" what they do and we embrace what they do. We're not stupid. We know exactly how bad their movies are and that's precisely why we love them. Tonight I was seeking Asylum. lol. I went looking for one that I hadn't seen yet and I settled on UNIVERSAL SOLDIERS. Set on a remote island a group of marines find themselves battling dozens of genetically modified cyborg super-soldiers. They're the product of a government experiment gone wrong and when they escape from an underground facility there's no stopping them. Despite the title suggesting a serious UNIVERSAL SOLDIER knock-off, this b-movie bares little resemblance. The super-soldiers might look the same and their programming seems all too familiar but the comparisons stop there. The storyline takes on more of a PREDATOR approach with the marines being stalked. The super-soldiers move as lightning speeds and have the ability to shape-shift. Ok. I fess up. This movie blows... it is NOT to the standard of most Asylum movies and it cheats the audience. Where other Asylum mockbusters are packed with high-concept SFX and loads of action, this movie meanders. It's all talk talk talk with very little combat. The UNIVERSAL SOLDIERS barely get any screen time and the marine characters don't really do anything at all. Were there lots of dodgy CGI FX and actual stuff happening then there would be something to enjoy. God only knows where the $200,000 budget went because it sure as hell isn't on screen. One of Asylum's worst. 

ALL of the movie's action is in this trailer. Watching this will do.

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