2013 / Director. Mark L Lester.
Today a friend of mine asked me why people watched crap creature feature movies and wondered what the appeal was. Naturally I took this opportunity to share my enthusiasm and explain my passion towards these schlocky flicks. If you're reading this then chances are you appreciate B-movies and so I wont bother delving into the allure of these beauties. So tonight, while my mind is on the genre, I thought I would give POSEIDON REX a whirl. Twenty years ago director Mark L Lester was making classics like CLASS OF 1984, SHOWDOWN IN LITTLE TOKYO and COMMANDO (amongst others) and now he seems to be stuck making movies such as PTERODACTYL and POSEIDON REX. A prehistoric dinosaur and it's eggs are unearthed from a giant sink hole in the tropical oceans off Belize. Naturally the dino runs amok, killing fishermen and destroying buildings. It's a mini-Godzilla looking for chow and it's tacky and it's cheesy. The CGI is awful and the acting is as expected. The "smart" women still have their tits out (even when working in lab coats) and the men are mostly shirtless. It's a dodgy movie and certainly lacks the oomph of the competing movies from the likes of The Asylum and Roger Corman. Where their films are high concept and get every bang for their buck, this one flounders and feels like it struggled with whatever tax breaks the Belize government granted them. And unlike those other films (Mega Shark, Piranhaconda, Sharknado) POSEIDON REX lacks heart. It's missing a passion for the genre, as though everyone involved thought "what the fuck are we doing?". I wanted to have fun with this but too little happens and when it does, it's half-arsed. Shame.