NUMBER TWOS: BEWARE! THE BLOB

1972 | DIR. LARRY HAGMAN | REVIEW BY GLENN COCHRANE.

You hit play on BEWARE! THE BLOB and you immediately ask yourself “what was I thinking?”. And a few minutes later “what am I watching?”. It is the sequel to the THE BLOB (1958) and the 14-years separating the films saw a drastic shift in tone, texture and its overall sentiment. The classic B-movie splendour of the original film was replaced with a cheap, grainy exploitation quality that upon first glance might be mistaken for a skin-flick. Where the '58 film took advantage of that era's fear of nuclear power the sequel makes use of schlock and satire to tell its story... and the result? Well.... it's strange to say the least.

BEWARE! THE BLOB was directed by Larry Hagman (yes, of I Dream of Jeanie and Dallas fame) and his involvement in such a low-budget independent film is just as perplexing as the film itself. The story goes that he lived next door to the producer of the original and had never seen the '58 film starring Steve McQueen. When the producer showed him the film Hagman said that he could get lots of his friends together for free (because they would all want to be blobbed) and that he would direct it. Lets suppose that he had energy to burn and needed to “spaz out” a little, because it's the only explanation.

And so what he created was a film unlike any other. It isn't a sequel at all, but rather a re-imaging. It adheres to the basic premise of the previous flick but injects a heavy dose of camp, which masquerades as satire. Furthermore, his direction was strangely surreal whereby he flirted with absurdism and lunacy. Take the opening title sequence for example; the film opens with an upbeat piece of music as a kitten frolics amongst long grass. It has no purpose aside from disorientating the viewer and it makes no sense. And yet that confusion is where much of the film's charm lies.

​Yes it's a bad film. It's a terrible film! But it's so damn fun. Hagman precedes each of his death sequences with insanely stupid set-ups, such as a husband camping in his lounge room while watching the original '58 movie, or a fat nude Russian man running down the highway... or a barber who refers to himself as a 'hair sculptor' and charges $400 per sculpt... and then splat, THE BLOB ATTACKS! It's total insanity! So insane that it could even be passed off as an art film.

The cast is inconsequential with a heap of Hagman's mates popping up for a scene or two. Some of them include Gerrit Graham, Dick Van Pattern, Cindy Williams, Sid Haig and Burgess Meredith, amongst others. And I could have sworn that I caught a glimpse of Paul Williams in there too.

Suffice to say that BEWARE! THE BLOB is a mixed bag of talent and mayhem. A stupid and ludicrous venture with no obvious redemption. As I already mentioned, there is definitely an element of charm, and it's the kind of schlock that you can enjoy with a puerile frame of mind. If you embrace the absurdism them you'll have a stack of fun but as far as sequels go in general (and creature-features for that matter) it is an absolute turd. No wonder Hagman never directed again.  ​