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MONSTER FEST 2013 DIARY # 6

24/11/2013

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When Monster Fest is done and dusted I reckon today will be THE highlight of the whole damn thing. I've come home tonight feeling completely buzzed and wishing I had the time to stick around for the after-drinks. 

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My afternoon began with the highly anticipated TRASHARAMA A-GO-GO. For those who don't know, Trasharama is a film festival all to it's own and has been mortifying sick film lovers for years. It's purpose is to showcase short films of a more - lets say... unsavoury - flavour. For the first time in it's 16 year history it has been incorporated into Monster Fest. Even though it's now part of a larger festival the reigns are still firmly in the hands of Dick Dale, the sick motherfucker who started the whole putrid thing. I've been to several Trasharama events over the years but definitely enjoyed today's helping the most. A true master-showman, Dick, played a devilishly fun MC. He promised an assortment of sick, twisted and perverted films and he delivered in spades. To be honest (and I'm not blowing smoke up anyones arse) I enjoyed all of the films. Of course some were stronger than others and some true stand-outs for me included Budget Cuts, Alice in Zombieland and A Little R & R for it's sheer audacity. 

The screening was broken into two fifty minute blocks with an intermission in between. I guess with a line-up of such perversity a well earned rest was in order. During this interval Dick Dale entertained the audience with some giveaways, courtesy of Club X. As Dick asked a series of questions and gave away some truly nasty sex gadgets, I decided that the questions were piss-easy and that I was going to bags myself the final prize. "What was the real name of the actor who ate dog shit in Pink Flamingos?" I called out GLENN MILSTEAD and won myself something very special - A Cyberskin Shitting Ass Stroker! This is a flesh-light of a whole new kind. Complete with real shit-scented lube and a repulsive collection of scat photos, it's probably the best prize I've ever won.

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My partner & I opened the lube and almost puked. No kidding. Thank God I didn't win the vomit version!
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Following the Trasharama screening I took the time to grab a drink and found some familiar faces to mingle with. Most of the conversation was about what we'd just seen and we were all as revved-up as each other. One thing is certain and that is that Dick's fantastic steaming pile of shorts has inspired me. So many ideas churned over in my head and such an event is perfect for realising some of the perversions that I've only ever spilled onto paper. So who knows... perhaps next year I'll reach in and tickle everyone's gag reflex. 

The foyer of Nova began to swell with people. Earlier during the day the complex was swamped with eager Doctor Who fans salivating over the long-awaited DAY OF THE DOCTORS... but at this moment everyone was itching to see Stuart Simpson's third feature film CHOCOLATE STRAWBERRY VANILLA. The screening sold-out and Monster Fest had to arrange for a second screening this coming Wednesday. I've been a fan of Stuart's for a few years now and some of you will have seen me writing about him here and there. I loved his two previous films and particularly loved his ambitious DARK PSYCHOSIS anthology series. I went into CHOCOLATE STRAWBERRY VANILLA expecting something good but I was nowhere near prepared for how amazing it was. No word of a lie, I was flabbergasted. This is easily one of the most impressive Australian films I've seen in years. When Stuart revealed to the audience that he shot it for $10,000 I was flawed... and when he went on to say that $3000 of that budget went to Mr Whippy, I was gobsmacked. How is such a polished and accomplished film possible for so little money? The answer is simple - an exceptional director. I will be publishing a proper review of the film this week and so I wont reveal much more about it here, only to say that it's a strong and powerful film. The script by Addison Heath is surprisingly daring while being completely endearing and hilarious. The film's star, Glenn Maynard is phenomenal. He carries the entire film and delivers a career-defining performance. Exceptional.

PictureSigned by Glenn Maynard.
Following the film the cast and crew gathered in the bar to mingle with everyone. Already knowing some of these guys I congratulated them and complemented them on a truly remarkable film. I was also able to meet a whole lot of new people, some I knew of and others who were complete strangers. There is no doubt this years Monster Fest is providing me with all sorts of fantastic friends and contacts. So far I am yet to meet a single arsehole and everyone has been so damn friendly. It all reenforces what Monster are all about - that the horror community is one of the strongest and most passionate of them all. We might all have sick tastes but we're all very genuine and easy-going.  

And so that wraps up 4 days of Monster Fest. It's been a blast. There's still another week to go and my next adventure won't be until Wednesday. Unfortunately work gets in the way.. ya know? Fuck! But alas I've got some wicked looking films ahead of me and I cannot wait. 

And so for now, if you will excuse me, I must go and test out my prize
(my girlfriend can have the night off). 




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